Anxiety

I’ve had a dull headache for the past 2 days, which seems to go away with Tylenol, but then comes right back. I have only taken Tylenol a couple times because I don’t want to take much of anything, so I’ve had the headache to worry about. My blood pressure has been fine on my home machine, but the anxiety of it is completely psyching me out. So, I’m going into the clinic today for a BP check and protein check, to (hopefully) ease my mind.

I am really pretty sure that it’s nothing. This headache is localized to one side of my head, and I would think a BP-related headache would be all over, like a tension headache. Also like I said, my BP is fine. But still... I can’t help but worry! This little voice in my head says “Pre-e can happen WITHOUT high BP” and “your BP machine might not be accurate.”

I check my ankles, hands, and face for swelling every day. I check my BP at least once a day. I check my weight regularly. I even scrutinize my pee in the morning— “does it still look yellow? Any hint of brown?” Every little change sends my brain into overdrive, wondering “Is this a normal pregnancy thing, or a sign of pre-e? Is this ‘it’?”

My anxiety comes and goes in waves. Right after a doctor’s appointment or ultrasound I feel great, everything is fine! I’ve been more relaxed in the past few weeks than I have been this whole pregnancy. So I guess I’m due for a bit of a freak-out. I am thankful that the freak-outs seem to be a bit more infrequent lately. But wow, I wish I could just RELAX.

Anyway, I’m glad that my doctor’s office is willing to do whatever I need to feel secure about this pregnancy. They are my therapy...LOL I’ll update after my appointment, and hopefully I’ll feel a lot better once someone else has looked at my pee. ;-)